Welcome to the celebrate brave podcast. 

I’m Nicole Trick Steinbach, your host, and the international bravery coach. On a mission to redefine brave. How we identify it, live it, and most importantly, celebrate it. Because when you build your brave, you change your world and that changes the world. Talk about something to celebrate. Let’s go.

Hello, brave people. All right y’all, today, the theme is to be in your too much. You know you’ve been told you’re too much of something. For example, let’s see, I’ve been told I’m too loud. I laughed too much. I’m too opinionated. I’m too smart. I’m too motivated. I sleep too much. Heavens, I’ve even been told I’m too tall.

What have you been told? You are too much of? Cause here’s the thing, you know something came into your mind. You know! Either because you’ve been told it so long that you actually believe it, or because you’ve been told it so often that it annoys the crap out of you. Wherever you are in your journey with that thing is all good. Okay.? So here’s the thing. 

Whatever you’ve been told is your too much is actually your gift to the world. Sit with that, sit with that. Whatever you’ve been told is your too much is actually your gift to the world. 

Let me share a little story. Oh, this one’s a little bit scary. It ends well. Okay. So all y’all who are parents send your kids to summer camp? I’m telling you at the beginning, it ends well. So I was a summer camp counselor. I think this was during college, it may have been during high school. I was definitely not in charge. There was this canoe trip planned with a bunch of girls from all over Southern Ohio, myself and the other. like leaders, counselors had been told that these girls had gotten onto a Lake a number of times, or actually pond a number of times when they had the basics down. It’s actually the Miami river in Ohio. It’s slow-moving. It can be deep, but not super deep. It’s a pretty great place to go canoeing. And I did a lot as I was growing up. 

So we get on to the river. And none of this is true. Okay. For whatever reason, it was a little bit faster pace. Like there were no Rapids or anything like that, but you kind of weren’t super excited about how it was moving. There were a lot of wash aways, which meant that roots  were hanging off on one side of the river in various places. And the reason you’re not excited about that is because you can get stuck underneath these roots that have been exposed because the earth has been washed away.

And most importantly to the story, I don’t know who put these girls onto a pond, but they did not have the basics. There was no reason for them to be in these canoes. And certainly not without a guide grown-up ish in each one of them, but they were, and it was pretty scary. 

The other counselors, there was one amazing woman from Australia. And there was myself  from the area. If I remember correctly, there was a woman from Belarus, who was a riot. And then I believe there were two or three others. We were totally outnumbered by the girls. The river’s moving a little bit faster. There’s been these wash-aways and the girls do not have the skills that they should have before they get onto open water, it was scary. 

Roots, you know where this is going. So a canoe with girls, and they’re probably, I don’t know, fourth grade, fifth grade. Get’s stuck!. Get stuck under the root and the water is starting to build up because they didn’t have the basic skills, they freaked out. They both leaned back and of course, water starts entering the canoe. And one of them is literally trapped. She feels trapped. Let me be clear. She feels trapped between the canoe, that’s at an angle and it’s filling with water and this exposed roots. 

I’m too tall. I am too tall. These long arms, these long arms, and this long torso and these longer legs, I was able to move over there. Couldn’t always touch the ground, but I could move over there. With the long arms, I could grab other roots that were exposed and, long arm, long leg. I could, holding one exposed root, push myself against the earth, against the water and pull her down and out. Now she wasn’t actually stuck, but she felt stuck. That’s why I was able to do it. It’s not like I’m superwoman. Okay. Cause I’m too tall. I’m too tall. Or am I? That’s one story, one inspiration. 

Another inspiration I want to give you is that I was told over and over and over and over that I was too curious and I asked too many questions. And dear listener, I actually tried to change that about myself. I tried to be quiet. There was this one situation where a person in a higher rank, I think he was like a VP or an SVB. And I was not. We left a meeting. I was in a change in communications role. This was in my tech career. We walk out of the meeting and he turns to me and he rips me. I mean, up one side down the next, like he berates me for asking too many questions and for being repetitive about whatever it was. I don’t even remember what it was, but I remember the humiliation of this older, more experienced, more authority-given colleague just ripping me in a hallway. And I tried, I tried not to be curious. I tried not to ask those questions. I really did. I thought he was right. Cause he wasn’t the first one to tell me, I asked too many questions and I repeated myself and I answered too much.

It’s like the perfect, perfect stuff to have a podcast. Right? 

Anyhow, he wasn’t the first, and because it was in public and it was in my career and I was in this vulnerable place and I was really ambitious and I wanted to be successful. I thought he was right. And I tried, y’all he was wrong!. And within a quarter, there was so much negative commentary about how I was not showing up. And there I was, I usually had such great questions and I lend to so much clarities for so many other people. That’s why I was in the room. I was actually too junior and too young and too whatever. See what I’m doing here, to be in that room, and yet there I was. Why was I there? Because I asked amazing questions. I clarify things until everyone could understand them unless they were choosing not to. Like the fellow who dressed me down in the hallway. That’s why I was there. And that’s why I was successful because my too much is actually my gift. 

And now as a coach, I am deeply curious. I’m deeply curious about people about where they want to go, how they want to go, who they want to be. What’s holding them back and how I can help. This too much of mine is why I was successful, why I am successful. And now in a role where I invest in other people’s success, it’s why they are so darn successful. Cause it’s not too much. It’s my gift. It’s my gift. What you have been told is your too much, go be and do in your too much.

Are you too detailed? What a gift! What a gift. Your detail-oriented nature, your interest in the last mile and the last kilometer in the last yard, the last foot, the last inch can save people’s lives. The bridge expertly designed,the home perfect for the people who live inside of it. The shuttle that safely reaches space and safely comes home. The bicycle that races down the mountain, the software that is truly inclusive of all people and needs. You’re not too detail-oriented honey, you have a gift to the world and you think too big you think too broad, you need to calm down. Honey, we need some people who are revolutionizing the tech industry, parenting, education, public transport climate. Are you really thinking too big or is your strategic nature, your gift?

Sometimes you got to look around and think, am I crazy, or am I surrounded by buttheads? Butt heads who can’t see my magic. Can’t see my gift, my skills, because what you are too much of is your gift. And if you’re not giving it to the world, to your family, your friends, your profession, and most importantly, your self, well, that’s just selfish. That’s just selfish. 

Homework. Cause this is a doozy y’all. Homework; on one piece of paper, you got the left column, choose a color you don’t really like. So for me, it would be like orange and write down what you’re too much of, just in that one column on the left, give it 30, 45 seconds. Just write down what you’re too much of. And then on the other side, the right side, take a color you really like. So for me, it would be purple or green. If I’m feeling super feisty, it would be red. Write the antidote. I’m too tall; my long arms kept the girls safe. I’m too curious; my questions clarify for everyone. My questions open up new possibilities. I am too ambitious; my success role models to others. What’s possible?. What you’ve been told is too much is your gift to the world. So give it. 

Thank you for listening to this episode of the celebrate brave podcast.

If you’re ready to build your brave, to live a life you love, and create a career that matters to you. Reach out! Together we can spend time one-on-one to explore how I can help you. And until then share this episode with people in your life. People who can join our movement. To redefine brave how we identify it, experience it, and celebrate it.